I Can Do It All On My Own...But Thank God I Don't Have To!

Here's the thing about me...I have always done everything on my own. From taking care of our home, to doing my job (work & my party favor business), I have never been one to accept help very easily. I remember the first time that anyone ever did my dishes (other than my best friend, Lisa) was when I brought Shea home from the hospital after giving birth. I can vividly remember one of my best friends, Dawn, in my kitchen- washing dishes, etc...and I remember how strange it felt. After being a nurse and the caretaker for so many years, for so many different patients and situations, it just felt so bizarre to me! I went years with going back to doing most of our everyday life chores on my own but I slowly gave in to the thought that when you are in a crisis situation, people (especially those who love me- which are so many- thank God!) truly want to help. A few years back when I had my Gallbladder out, I will admit to being scared. It was an emergency surgery (my first surgery) to which I cried like a big baby the minute Cin (my sis) and Amy walked in. It was in those few weeks that I finally realized how much I depend on my family and friends. I even called Rob at 2:00am to take me to emergency- talk about a nice ex-husband friendship! In those days, I had many friends bring Shea & I dinner, have Shea over and just generally make sure we were ok. I swore that I would never again try to do everything on my own and since then I happily have learned to accept help when it is offered. Since I have had this recent surgery (hysterectomy) I have never felt more loved in my life. I always tell Cindy that she is the best sister but "best" is an understatement with all that she has done for me in the past 2 weeks. Even though this surgery was scheduled, it was done very quickly. When I called Cin, she just dropped everything and was there with Amy at the hospital once again! They took care of my car, took Shea and Cindy and her family kept her safe the whole time that I was in the hospital. Do you know what a sense of peace that brought me? I've had so many phone calls, so many visitors, so many flower deliveries, dinners brought over, but most of all, I again feel so blessed and loved by my family and my friends. Accepting their love and help brings such a sense of joy to all of us. Donna, Mel & Heather have been so sweet through it all. Heather actually got to see first hand how silly I am with the boys as she walked all the way down to the OR with me. Two of my best friends, Libbs & Patti Watti have been there so much. They came and visited in the hospital, Patti brought me a shake when I couldn't bear to eat anything else. They brought me my favorite dinner when I got home. Libbs has been the one who has taken Shea to the grocery store for the past 2 weeks. Libbs also picked me up from the hospital and took me to my Dr.'s appointment today. I am usually so strong, yet my strength these days has come from them, their words of encouragement, their peace in telling me that Shea will be able to stay with them if I needed them to take her. Tonight, Patti Watti is bringing over her puppy and another strawberry shake for me! Min brought me over her birthday tea party from work that Cherie put together so I wouldn't miss out. Kim came (pregnant with her 5th) and brought me flowers leaving her 4 kids with Dean. With Lisa being in Oregon, it has been so difficult for her not being here with me. There have been many phone calls where either she is crying or I am crying. But I know she's there and it's a comfort to me. I know out of anybody, she feels my pain and hurt just as a twin sister would. (We've been friends since we were 5 years old) I wouldn't ever trade her love and friendship for anything in the world. There's something to be said about the person that I am that even Rob (my ex-husband) and Tammie (his new wife of over 2 years) came and saw me in the hospital. Tammie has a beautiful garden and they brought me roses and they brought me dinner the first night that I got home. Shea has done more than her fair share around here...a lot of picking up things that I have dropped, throwing trash, vacuuming, laundry, etc...I just smile and tell her, "Welcome to Mommy's world" to which she just laughs.

I am so loved and I do know it. I am blessed and I never take it for granted. I know that I will soon be the one helping out my family and friends, but for now...I am thankful for each and every one of them.

I cannot even imagine where I would be today were it not for that handful of friends who have given me a heart full of joy.

Charles R. Swindoll

Friendship improves happiness and abates misery, by the doubling of our joy and the dividing of our grief.

Marcus Cicero

We are born into our families, but we earn our friendships.

Rebecca Stefof